Thank heavens, for little girls....

Today I am thinking of the women who have in one way or other affected my life. The most important person is the one who gave me life - my mum.

I never appreciated her till I was an adult, and appreciated her even more when I became a mother myself. Looking back, she made everything seem easy. She worked, tutored us and almost all my cousins, cooked and cleaned. I used to tease her that she lived in la-la land because she was always cheerful. She was terribly old-fashioned and I think if she could have kept me locked up away from lecherous boys till I was 40, she would have. I didn't understand it then, but now, I do thank her for it.

She showed me what courage was. When she was diagnosed with cancer, it didn't stop her from working or traveling. Even when it was affecting her leg and she could only hobble, she drove to school everyday to teach. She went to Finland with what I called her 'poo bag' after part of her colon was removed. A little thing like that was not going to stop her from seeing Santa Claus!

It's been seven years since she died and I think about her every single day. I am what I am because of her.

The next woman who played a part in making me who I am was my maternal grandmother. She had it tough. 10 children and no maid!

She was a great cook and I remember going to visit mamma and having my favourite steamed chicken. When she was about 70, she discovered pizza and loved it. So we would bring a pizza for her and she'd chew on it (took some time cos she was wearing dentures). When I hear the phrase 'tough old bird', I'd think of my grandma. Her will to live was strong. She was a cancer survivor and lived way past the time the doctors gave her.

It's been a long, long time since I've held my grandma's hand but I still remember how those hands felt - wrinkled and small. Hands that have held 10 of her own babies and 14 of her babies' babies.

I would not be here if it wasn't for these two women. They have played a part in the way I think and act. Our past does define who we are as adults and I have been lucky to have had two strong role models in my life.

A taste of home

One of the things that I miss being away from Singapore is the food. Many people I have met often rave about the variety of food found in Singapore. Whenever I go back for a visit, I often feel like I'm on a food safari (ie hunting down my favourite food and devouring it!).

Being away from Singapore, I can't just go to the nearest kopi tiam for my cravings when it hits me. I've had no choice but to start to learn how to cook some local dishes. One of our favourites is 'hae mee' or noodles with prawns. On my last trip back, I was upset to find that the 'hae mee' stall near our place had closed down. I felt short changed.

I recently had a whole bunch of prawn heads and shells (my maid thought I was strange for not throwing it out) and decided to cook 'hae mee'. I even have extra big bowls for it so that TH can have an extra portion and slurp to his heart's content.

It's actually pretty easy to prepare just a little time consuming because I grind the prawn heads and shells before straining the stock. I love it when there is a red film to the stock. It's all the yummy sweetness from the prawn heads.

Ingredients:

1-2 kg prawns (de-shell and keep the heads and tails)
10 cloves of garlic
500g pork ribs
bean sprouts
kangkong
2-3 tablespoons of sugar
salt to taste

Fried shallots for garnishing

Method:

Fry the garlic with the prawn heads and shells till shells are a bit burnt around the edges.

Transfer prawn heads and shells to 1 litre water. Simmer. Add pork bones. Simmer for about an hour. Add salt and sugar to taste.

Scoop out prawn heads with stock and blend.Take out pork bones and put aside.

Strain the stock and add pork bones back to strained stock.

Simmer for 15 minutes. Add shelled prawns. Scoop out when cooked.

Add stock to egg noodles, bee hoon and serve with bean sprouts and kang kong.

One tough Cookie

Cookie: Born ? Died 26 March 2007

Dear Cookie,

This week marks the second anniversary of your death. I can't believe that two years have passed so quickly. I often wonder what you would have been like if you had the chance to grow old. Difficult, I would imagine, given your handicap. But your poor broken back and backward legs are not how I remembered you. Your spirit and sweet, sweet nature (guess your name is quite appropriate) is what I recall.

I remember the first time we (Sean and I) caught sight of you. We were on our way home and at a traffic light. I saw this white shape 'slither' across the road. Couldn't believe that you could move so fast using only your front paws. Needless to say, we took you in and brought you to the vet. Funnily, I was never afraid that you would bite me. You were a stray that had been knocked over by a car and left with paralysed hind legs, life must have been hard for you. Yet, you let me carry you and never growled even when you were poked and prodded at the vet's.

Trying out the 'wheelchair'

Sean loved you. You were HIS. He never felt this way about our other dogs. He named you Cookie because he didn't like the nurses at the vet giving you the nickname "men" (which means smelly in Thai). He insisted we visit you every single day after school. Poor you. You were in the hospital for almost two months. You had a host of parasites in your blood stream, on top of that, your hind legs were raw and almost scrapped to the bone because you were dragging yourself across rough asphalt.

You loved treats. You would come with your tail swishing from side to side when you heard 'Cookie.... treat'. You were a wanderer. I guess given your history, to keep you caged up would be the worst kind of punishment. You took to your 'wheelchair' and would zip around in it.

But I guess you were not meant to be long with us. We were devastated when you died. My little boy cried for days when he found out. He kept asking why did God take you when you didn't do anything wrong.

The last picture of you with Sean.

You may have been with us for a very short time, but you will always be remembered with love. I know that you are in doggy heaven and running around free and without pain. You may have been unwanted when you were born, but you were loved when you left this world. Rest in peace.

A kick and a jab

A few years ago I thought of starting Sean on some form of martial arts. I happened to speak to his swimming coach and he mentioned Muay Thai. Honestly, it never crossed my mind because my impression of Muay Thai was that it was pretty rough. Besides I thought Sean was too young for it (he was six).

I asked around and luckily we have a friend who has several Muay Thai instructors on his payroll and he offered lessons for Sean. We decided to give it a try. I have to admit I was apprehensive as what I knew of the sport was what I saw on TV - lots of hard kicks and grappling. I didn't want my baby exposed to that!

After a few lessons I saw the beauty in the sport. How graceful the Wai Kru was (Wai Kru means to show respect to your teacher and only the head instructor can teach that. It may look like a dance but is acutally a way for the boxers to stretch). The fluidity in the kicks that belie how much it could hurt someone. The grappling that seems to be just two guys hanging on for dear life but in actual fact, skill and technique is involved

Sean has been doing it for close to three years now. He likes it and one day when he is older, I hope he appreciates the fact that he was given this chance to learn Muay Thai. One really good thing was that TH decided to take it up too after sitting in on a couple of lessons. Now, HE is obsessed with it and if he could, would go everyday. It is a good thing because he is doing things that he thought he could not do after his accident.

It is good for Sean because it is a very aerobic sport and at the same time, it teaches you to defend yourself. So once a week, my skinny little boy puts on his Muay Thai shorts and heads for the gym where he will kick, punch, elbow and jab his instructors. Occasionally, he will get to spar with an older child (one of whom is only 12 and already has 40 fights under his belt!).

Final first impressions

So, we made our recce trip to HCMC. Here is what I feel so far:

Traffic: As bad as BKK only 100 times more noisy. Every one is trigger happy on the car/motor bike horn. I realise that some cars have two kinds of horns - the short, sharp one that says 'hey, get out of the way' and the more melodious one that says 'by the way, you are too close for comfort'. Both kinds of horns are used indiscriminately and often.

The right of way belongs to the smaller vehicle ie motor bike. So the car inches forward while the bikes flow around it.

Pedestrians: Rule of thumb when crossing the road - show no fear. Once you hesitate, you are gone. Step confidently off the curb (pray like mad) and then take baby steps (and pray even more) till you reach the other side. A local had this tip: make eye contact then look away. Once you have done that, it's the driver's responsibility NOT to knock you down.

People: Generally they are very nice and polite. Of course they find it hysterical when we mangle Vietnamese. Many of them understand basic English. When all else fails, sign language always works.

At the market.

Shopping: After BKK, it's like going back to Singapore 20 years ago. I asked to be taken to their best shopping centre and supermarket. One is called Diamond and the other is Parkson (yes, the chain from Malaysia).

The supermarket is small with not much selection. Things are also more expensive, more like prices in Singapore. Eg. a bag of 5kg rice is about S$8 in BKK but it's S$20 in HCMC.

As for the shopping centre itself, I think I'll be saving money as there isn't much to buy. Even the bookshop had few titles. Looks like I'll be stocking up on books too before I leave.

Decided to venture to the market. Biggest one is called 'Ben tinh' and supposedly has everything. I sort of expected a mini Chatujak. It had loads of food and fresh produce (think that is where I'm going to buy my fruit and veg). It also had loads of touristy stuff like lacquer ware, silk bags etc. Didn't take us long to walk it.

Pho Bo or beef noodles.

Food: Aaahhh... my favourite part of any country. most famous Vietnamese dish is Pho. We had a few versions. Tried the touristy version (in a restaurant called Pho 24 which is a chain), which was tasty but so-so. Then a local recommended one that is in a coffee shop (my favourite kind of place) and it was delicious! They ate it with 'you char kway' (fried dough fritters) which I have never tried before but it was addictive.

We tried the fried spring rolls, grilled seafood and cuisine from Central Vietnam (the Hue region) which was a little different. The noodles were a bit more spicy and they had dry versions with grilled pork.

Eating out is not cheap. An average meal we had was about S$20 for three bowls of noodles.

One of the cafes where people all face in one direction and just chat or people watch.

Bits and pieces: The only fast food chain there is KFC. There was not a McDonalds or Starbucks to be seen. There are many little cafes all over and people just sit (all facing outwards) , drink their beverage and watch the world go by.

I did not see any stray animals when I was there. I was told that Vietnamese do eat dogs. Don't think they'll be very interested in my two doggies as they are small and skinny.

The streets are better paved than the ones in BKK. Which makes walking around a little easier.

Life there will be different for all of us. It will not be what we are used to here in BKK or even Singapore. I look at it as being a next phase in our family's life and an adventure that will last us for life.

First impressions

It's been a long day and I'm overwhelmed. Ho Chi Minh City is what I had expected and more. The honking....even now as I'm sitting in my room, I can faintly hear it. The number of kamakazi motor bikes on the road has me shuddering everytime anyone of them comes near.

We spent the day looking at a school (can't go through 2 school tours in one day,will be information overload for me) and at several houses. Thank goodness there are not that many international schools in HCMC. I've narrowed it down to two and am going to see the next one tomorrow.

I used to be in real estate when I was in Singapore. I loved it as it gave me a chanceto peek into other people's lives (even then I was a busybody) and see how they lived. So, I was pretty excited about looking at some houses today.

It was an eye opener. For one thing, the ones we saw had as many stories as the house we are staying in now in BKK. A couple stood out because one had a room dedicated to a bar that came complete with pink and blue neon disco lights (seriously)! The last one that we saw appealed to TH and Sean as the top floor was a recreation room that came with a pool table (TH) and had a karaoke system, again accompanied with floral pink and blue neon. Sean loved the karaoke which has me worried as it could be a sign of things to come when I'll have to haul him away from karaoke joints to do his homework!

Of course being the foodie that I am, we had to have our pho. For dinner we were introduced to a restaurant that served central Vietnamese food. Didn't take any pictures as we were starving. It was something I've never had before but very yummy. Even their noodle was served dry with grilled pork and loads of vegetables (mint, cucumber, bean sprouts etc).

Am still trying to get used to the currency. All those zeroes at the end of it confuses me. When I had to pay 250,000 dong (don't you just love what it's called?) for lunch, I was horrified till I realised it was bout 500bht or S$25. Food here is more expensive than BKK for sure. I guess it is something we have to get used to.

I have to admit, first day, first impressions and am a bit apprehensive. I don't remember feeling this way when I first went to BKK. I guess it will be OK. Hmmm... now all I need is to find me a good mani-pedi place.

With these hands

This was made using a clay called 'Jumping Clay'. Don't ask me why it's called that because it does NOT jump or anything. It feels like Play Doh when you take it out.Unlike Play Doh, it dries up to be non-sticky and foam like.

I am not creative. Neither is TH. That is why it surprises us that Sean has a spark of creativity. That boy loves making things. I have a boxful of cards, a trayful of figurines made out of clay and bits and bobs of things that he made hanging from various parts of the house.

His school provides a range of after school activities. This term he has decided to take Japanese cooking. I was not too keen as it was a bit expensive (it's outsourced so a fee is payable) . But I saw how keen he was and agreed to it as I try to encourage interests if it's educational and affordable. So far, he has made a range of sushi, dessert and a rice burger. Unfortunately, most of the end product did not last long enough for me to take pictures. The last one made it only because I took it away the minute he stepped out. Personally, I think it is pretty good. It tasted

pretty good too!

Made from rice, egg. Mayo was used as 'glue'

Part and parcel of life

This is what I face everyday on my way home from school.

Bangkok - City of Angels, place where Tom Yam originated from and also notorious for its traffic jams. After living here for so long, I have gotten quite used to the slow crawl of traffic. What makes it bearable is the fact that most of the drivers are fairly patient (you seldom hear honking) and drivers let you pass through or cut into their lanes. I guess if everyone figures they are in the same predicament, then hey, why sweat it.

So what does one do in a traffic jam? Well, it depends on the jam itself. There are what I call 'everyday' jams. These are where traffic slows down because you have five lanes that suddenly converge into two.

Or you have the case of the neverending traffic light. Traffic lights here can last up to three - four minutes. Doesn't sound long, right? Wait till you are in desperate need of the loo, then it becomes and eternity. My friend's son has had to pee in the bottle because he couldn't hold it in. There was an incident where the driver of the car fell asleep whilst waiting for the light to change. Had to get a motorbike boy to knock on the window to wake her up.

Then you have the jams caused by the 'side parkers'. These are the people who park to one side of a road that is already too narrow for two cars to pass. Amazingly, no matter how tight the squeeze, you will emerge on the other side without anyone cursing or flipping you the bird.

Another aspect of the 'side parkers' are the taxis that will screech to a sudden stop to pick up a fare. My favourite is when the would be passenger has a 'conversation' with the taxi driver. I'm guessing that they are talking about destination or how to find a place. The beauty of this is both taxi and passenger will ignore the growing queue of cars behind them.

The ultimate traffic jam is one that is caused by a political protest. I was fortunate (?) to be caught in one last year. It took me more than two hours to reach my destination (I could have flown to Singapore during that time). Why did I not turn back you may ask? Problem is there is a point of no return and once you passed it, you are stuck, stuck, stuck.

So, based on all these different jams, the question is "what does one do?" Many take the time to groom themselves ie make up, combing hair. I think if hairdryers could be plugged in, they would be used. You can almost finish reading the newspapers. Many take cat naps. But my favourite of all, is you can have your breakfast/lunch/dinner while in the car.

Portrait of an artist

This post is inspired by Monica ( http://hedgehogcomms.blogspot.com)who wrote about her son's artwork.

Sean has always loved to draw. Don't know where he gets it from as both TH and I are artistically challenged. He started off with the usual finger painting, progressed to Picasso like works and now he tries to tell stories with his little scribbles. He is fascinated with the whole process and will stand quietly and watch while a person sketches or paints.

I have a box of his drawings which I plan to keep and give it to him when he is older. Many of his drawings come with little "I love you" notes. When he is a surly, rebellious teen, I will fish these notes out and remind me of this time in his life when he was sweet and not shy to tell his mum that he loved her.

His first 'family' painting. Includes all our pets, even those that died. His 'girlfriend' Po somehow made it into
the picture too.


One of his many notes: It reads " I love you mam and dad bcos you ar snis to me"
Don't know what the bird is supposed to signify

He started drawing really small figures (some with details) to tell a story. Can't remember what this one was about.