Starting over

I realised that I have not been blogging for a long while. Many things have changed since my last post.

For one thing, we have left BKK (a place we have called home for the past 10 years) and are now living in Saigon or HCMC. Life is very different here. We have been here for four months and I am still trying to get used to many things.

Slowly, but surely we are settling down to life here. I will rouse my lazy bones to blog about the ins and outs of living in Vietnam.

Counting sheep

"Sheep? As is baa- baa, in Thailand?" That was my reaction when I heard about this farm/resort. I Googled it and it looked really nice. But pictures do lie don't they. So we decided to make a day trip out of it. Three families set off (seven adults, five children and one big dog).

It was a fairly pleasant two hour drive but I was still recovering from spending three days in the sun, so I was a little stoned (so to speak). This farm/hotel is located in the Ratchaburi province. It is called the Scenery Resort and it really had sheep like the ones we think Mary had. We paid our entrance fee (80 baht) and after putting on the apron (in case the sheep get excited and jump up) we went into the enclosed area with a big bunch of leaves.

Man, these animals may look all fluffy and cute but they were aggresive when it came to food. They pushed, they shoved and baa-ed really loudly while we held onto the leaves and tried not to get trampled on or fall on the grass that was strewn with little nuggets of poo. They had really thick coats of wool and I wonder how they survive in this heat. It was about 37C when we were there. They were pretty energetic and I even saw a few jump over the fence to get at the food.

There is a restaurant there that surprisingly has only one lamb dish (and it's NZ lamb) on its menu. Guess the sheep there are to add to the scenery only and not to feed the hungry hordes (people like me).

Only drawback is that becuse of the heat, there were loads of flies and the restaurant is open air. So if you don't fancy fighting with flies I would suggest that going there during the cool 'winter' months would be a better idea.

On the whole it was a nice way to spend a Sunday as we discovered yet another part to Thailand that we never did.

Water, water everywhere

This year's Songkran was marred by the political unrest that started a few days before the New Year. Since living here, we have experienced a coup, state of emergencies (think it was three) and a few protests. In a way, it's been interesting to see this kind of political mechanism work (rightly or wrongly).

I was horrified as I watched the news coverage of the protests and the storming of the hotel where the ASEAN summit was being held. If I wasn't living here in BKK, I would fear for whoever was living in Thailand. It felt quite surreal to watch the violent images on TV and then look out my window to see my son and his friends screaming with joy and laughter as they doused each other and any car/bike/person that was unfortunate to come in their path. They were oblivious to what was happening out in the real world. Their immediate thoughts were just to have fun. And I was glad that they did. It was contagious as we adults joined in the water fights that went on. We chased the kids and each other with pails or water.

For two whole days, we 'played Songkran' as Sean would say. The children started in the morning, took a break for lunch and continued in the late afternoon. I honestly odn't know where they got the energy from. I was exhausted and I didn't run around as much as they did.

I felt guilty as so much water was wasted. All over BKK, water fights were happening and people were chucking water like nobody's business. I admit that in this heat (38C) it felt great to have a bucket of water thrown on you.

At the end of the Songkran holidays, it was back to reality for many people. Messes had to be cleaned up and life had to go back to as normal as it could.

This is one fun and fabulous festival that I will miss when I leave BKK. It's such a simple thing - using water. No electronics, no gadgetry and nothing high tech. Back to basics and it is great!

Splish, splash

This is what Songkran is ALL about.

Thais celebrate their festivals with great gusto. This is most evident during one of the most important dates on the Thai calendar - Songkran. Songkran is the Thai new year (it doesn't stop them from celebrating the English New Year with a bang). It occurs sometime in April and it's normally a three day event. It's also known as the Water Festival because huge amounts of water is used to throw on people. The splashing of water is meant to wash away the bad luck of the previous year.

It helps that April is normally the hottest month of the year (it can reach to 40C). So having water thrown at you is welcoming. If you are walking along the main Sukhumvit area, you will generally be asked (very politely) if it's OK to have water dribbled/squirted at you. It's hard to say no in the spirit of the event. But if you do decline, a smile goes a long way.

Since coming here, we have gone to Pattaya once and it was water,water everywhere! The traffic leading there was horrible (normally would take about two hours but it took us four). Pubs and restaurants were crowded. It was an experience that I would not repeat again. But Pattaya is one of the popular spots for Songkran. The others being Khao San Road (in Bangkok, also known as backpackers road) and Chiang Mai. Water fights there can get pretty wild so it's not advisable if you have young children.

Last year we decided to have a 'moo baan' (estate) Songkran celebrations. We inflated the plastic wading pool, filled it and a few buckets with water, added a cooler of beer and soft drinks to the side, topped up our water pistols and we were ready! No one was spared - pedestrains, cars, motor cyclists and even cyclist who stopped to let us cool him down! Throw in a water fight with a truckload of Thais and we all had a blast! The children loved playing with the water and having water fights. We had to stop them from running after the cars. Many drivers were nice enough to slow down fo them to get a shot in and a few even stopped in the middle of the street (I suspect they wanted a semi car wash). The adults loved behaving and feeling like kids again - soaked to the skin while taking part in a good old fashioned water fight.

Cooling down!

Next week is Songkran. As it will be our last one, I definitely will be out there with the children, armed and ready to go! As we say here ' Sawasdee pee mai' (Happy New Year!)

Thank heavens, for little girls....

Today I am thinking of the women who have in one way or other affected my life. The most important person is the one who gave me life - my mum.

I never appreciated her till I was an adult, and appreciated her even more when I became a mother myself. Looking back, she made everything seem easy. She worked, tutored us and almost all my cousins, cooked and cleaned. I used to tease her that she lived in la-la land because she was always cheerful. She was terribly old-fashioned and I think if she could have kept me locked up away from lecherous boys till I was 40, she would have. I didn't understand it then, but now, I do thank her for it.

She showed me what courage was. When she was diagnosed with cancer, it didn't stop her from working or traveling. Even when it was affecting her leg and she could only hobble, she drove to school everyday to teach. She went to Finland with what I called her 'poo bag' after part of her colon was removed. A little thing like that was not going to stop her from seeing Santa Claus!

It's been seven years since she died and I think about her every single day. I am what I am because of her.

The next woman who played a part in making me who I am was my maternal grandmother. She had it tough. 10 children and no maid!

She was a great cook and I remember going to visit mamma and having my favourite steamed chicken. When she was about 70, she discovered pizza and loved it. So we would bring a pizza for her and she'd chew on it (took some time cos she was wearing dentures). When I hear the phrase 'tough old bird', I'd think of my grandma. Her will to live was strong. She was a cancer survivor and lived way past the time the doctors gave her.

It's been a long, long time since I've held my grandma's hand but I still remember how those hands felt - wrinkled and small. Hands that have held 10 of her own babies and 14 of her babies' babies.

I would not be here if it wasn't for these two women. They have played a part in the way I think and act. Our past does define who we are as adults and I have been lucky to have had two strong role models in my life.

A taste of home

One of the things that I miss being away from Singapore is the food. Many people I have met often rave about the variety of food found in Singapore. Whenever I go back for a visit, I often feel like I'm on a food safari (ie hunting down my favourite food and devouring it!).

Being away from Singapore, I can't just go to the nearest kopi tiam for my cravings when it hits me. I've had no choice but to start to learn how to cook some local dishes. One of our favourites is 'hae mee' or noodles with prawns. On my last trip back, I was upset to find that the 'hae mee' stall near our place had closed down. I felt short changed.

I recently had a whole bunch of prawn heads and shells (my maid thought I was strange for not throwing it out) and decided to cook 'hae mee'. I even have extra big bowls for it so that TH can have an extra portion and slurp to his heart's content.

It's actually pretty easy to prepare just a little time consuming because I grind the prawn heads and shells before straining the stock. I love it when there is a red film to the stock. It's all the yummy sweetness from the prawn heads.

Ingredients:

1-2 kg prawns (de-shell and keep the heads and tails)
10 cloves of garlic
500g pork ribs
bean sprouts
kangkong
2-3 tablespoons of sugar
salt to taste

Fried shallots for garnishing

Method:

Fry the garlic with the prawn heads and shells till shells are a bit burnt around the edges.

Transfer prawn heads and shells to 1 litre water. Simmer. Add pork bones. Simmer for about an hour. Add salt and sugar to taste.

Scoop out prawn heads with stock and blend.Take out pork bones and put aside.

Strain the stock and add pork bones back to strained stock.

Simmer for 15 minutes. Add shelled prawns. Scoop out when cooked.

Add stock to egg noodles, bee hoon and serve with bean sprouts and kang kong.

One tough Cookie

Cookie: Born ? Died 26 March 2007

Dear Cookie,

This week marks the second anniversary of your death. I can't believe that two years have passed so quickly. I often wonder what you would have been like if you had the chance to grow old. Difficult, I would imagine, given your handicap. But your poor broken back and backward legs are not how I remembered you. Your spirit and sweet, sweet nature (guess your name is quite appropriate) is what I recall.

I remember the first time we (Sean and I) caught sight of you. We were on our way home and at a traffic light. I saw this white shape 'slither' across the road. Couldn't believe that you could move so fast using only your front paws. Needless to say, we took you in and brought you to the vet. Funnily, I was never afraid that you would bite me. You were a stray that had been knocked over by a car and left with paralysed hind legs, life must have been hard for you. Yet, you let me carry you and never growled even when you were poked and prodded at the vet's.

Trying out the 'wheelchair'

Sean loved you. You were HIS. He never felt this way about our other dogs. He named you Cookie because he didn't like the nurses at the vet giving you the nickname "men" (which means smelly in Thai). He insisted we visit you every single day after school. Poor you. You were in the hospital for almost two months. You had a host of parasites in your blood stream, on top of that, your hind legs were raw and almost scrapped to the bone because you were dragging yourself across rough asphalt.

You loved treats. You would come with your tail swishing from side to side when you heard 'Cookie.... treat'. You were a wanderer. I guess given your history, to keep you caged up would be the worst kind of punishment. You took to your 'wheelchair' and would zip around in it.

But I guess you were not meant to be long with us. We were devastated when you died. My little boy cried for days when he found out. He kept asking why did God take you when you didn't do anything wrong.

The last picture of you with Sean.

You may have been with us for a very short time, but you will always be remembered with love. I know that you are in doggy heaven and running around free and without pain. You may have been unwanted when you were born, but you were loved when you left this world. Rest in peace.

A kick and a jab

A few years ago I thought of starting Sean on some form of martial arts. I happened to speak to his swimming coach and he mentioned Muay Thai. Honestly, it never crossed my mind because my impression of Muay Thai was that it was pretty rough. Besides I thought Sean was too young for it (he was six).

I asked around and luckily we have a friend who has several Muay Thai instructors on his payroll and he offered lessons for Sean. We decided to give it a try. I have to admit I was apprehensive as what I knew of the sport was what I saw on TV - lots of hard kicks and grappling. I didn't want my baby exposed to that!

After a few lessons I saw the beauty in the sport. How graceful the Wai Kru was (Wai Kru means to show respect to your teacher and only the head instructor can teach that. It may look like a dance but is acutally a way for the boxers to stretch). The fluidity in the kicks that belie how much it could hurt someone. The grappling that seems to be just two guys hanging on for dear life but in actual fact, skill and technique is involved

Sean has been doing it for close to three years now. He likes it and one day when he is older, I hope he appreciates the fact that he was given this chance to learn Muay Thai. One really good thing was that TH decided to take it up too after sitting in on a couple of lessons. Now, HE is obsessed with it and if he could, would go everyday. It is a good thing because he is doing things that he thought he could not do after his accident.

It is good for Sean because it is a very aerobic sport and at the same time, it teaches you to defend yourself. So once a week, my skinny little boy puts on his Muay Thai shorts and heads for the gym where he will kick, punch, elbow and jab his instructors. Occasionally, he will get to spar with an older child (one of whom is only 12 and already has 40 fights under his belt!).

Final first impressions

So, we made our recce trip to HCMC. Here is what I feel so far:

Traffic: As bad as BKK only 100 times more noisy. Every one is trigger happy on the car/motor bike horn. I realise that some cars have two kinds of horns - the short, sharp one that says 'hey, get out of the way' and the more melodious one that says 'by the way, you are too close for comfort'. Both kinds of horns are used indiscriminately and often.

The right of way belongs to the smaller vehicle ie motor bike. So the car inches forward while the bikes flow around it.

Pedestrians: Rule of thumb when crossing the road - show no fear. Once you hesitate, you are gone. Step confidently off the curb (pray like mad) and then take baby steps (and pray even more) till you reach the other side. A local had this tip: make eye contact then look away. Once you have done that, it's the driver's responsibility NOT to knock you down.

People: Generally they are very nice and polite. Of course they find it hysterical when we mangle Vietnamese. Many of them understand basic English. When all else fails, sign language always works.

At the market.

Shopping: After BKK, it's like going back to Singapore 20 years ago. I asked to be taken to their best shopping centre and supermarket. One is called Diamond and the other is Parkson (yes, the chain from Malaysia).

The supermarket is small with not much selection. Things are also more expensive, more like prices in Singapore. Eg. a bag of 5kg rice is about S$8 in BKK but it's S$20 in HCMC.

As for the shopping centre itself, I think I'll be saving money as there isn't much to buy. Even the bookshop had few titles. Looks like I'll be stocking up on books too before I leave.

Decided to venture to the market. Biggest one is called 'Ben tinh' and supposedly has everything. I sort of expected a mini Chatujak. It had loads of food and fresh produce (think that is where I'm going to buy my fruit and veg). It also had loads of touristy stuff like lacquer ware, silk bags etc. Didn't take us long to walk it.

Pho Bo or beef noodles.

Food: Aaahhh... my favourite part of any country. most famous Vietnamese dish is Pho. We had a few versions. Tried the touristy version (in a restaurant called Pho 24 which is a chain), which was tasty but so-so. Then a local recommended one that is in a coffee shop (my favourite kind of place) and it was delicious! They ate it with 'you char kway' (fried dough fritters) which I have never tried before but it was addictive.

We tried the fried spring rolls, grilled seafood and cuisine from Central Vietnam (the Hue region) which was a little different. The noodles were a bit more spicy and they had dry versions with grilled pork.

Eating out is not cheap. An average meal we had was about S$20 for three bowls of noodles.

One of the cafes where people all face in one direction and just chat or people watch.

Bits and pieces: The only fast food chain there is KFC. There was not a McDonalds or Starbucks to be seen. There are many little cafes all over and people just sit (all facing outwards) , drink their beverage and watch the world go by.

I did not see any stray animals when I was there. I was told that Vietnamese do eat dogs. Don't think they'll be very interested in my two doggies as they are small and skinny.

The streets are better paved than the ones in BKK. Which makes walking around a little easier.

Life there will be different for all of us. It will not be what we are used to here in BKK or even Singapore. I look at it as being a next phase in our family's life and an adventure that will last us for life.

First impressions

It's been a long day and I'm overwhelmed. Ho Chi Minh City is what I had expected and more. The honking....even now as I'm sitting in my room, I can faintly hear it. The number of kamakazi motor bikes on the road has me shuddering everytime anyone of them comes near.

We spent the day looking at a school (can't go through 2 school tours in one day,will be information overload for me) and at several houses. Thank goodness there are not that many international schools in HCMC. I've narrowed it down to two and am going to see the next one tomorrow.

I used to be in real estate when I was in Singapore. I loved it as it gave me a chanceto peek into other people's lives (even then I was a busybody) and see how they lived. So, I was pretty excited about looking at some houses today.

It was an eye opener. For one thing, the ones we saw had as many stories as the house we are staying in now in BKK. A couple stood out because one had a room dedicated to a bar that came complete with pink and blue neon disco lights (seriously)! The last one that we saw appealed to TH and Sean as the top floor was a recreation room that came with a pool table (TH) and had a karaoke system, again accompanied with floral pink and blue neon. Sean loved the karaoke which has me worried as it could be a sign of things to come when I'll have to haul him away from karaoke joints to do his homework!

Of course being the foodie that I am, we had to have our pho. For dinner we were introduced to a restaurant that served central Vietnamese food. Didn't take any pictures as we were starving. It was something I've never had before but very yummy. Even their noodle was served dry with grilled pork and loads of vegetables (mint, cucumber, bean sprouts etc).

Am still trying to get used to the currency. All those zeroes at the end of it confuses me. When I had to pay 250,000 dong (don't you just love what it's called?) for lunch, I was horrified till I realised it was bout 500bht or S$25. Food here is more expensive than BKK for sure. I guess it is something we have to get used to.

I have to admit, first day, first impressions and am a bit apprehensive. I don't remember feeling this way when I first went to BKK. I guess it will be OK. Hmmm... now all I need is to find me a good mani-pedi place.

With these hands

This was made using a clay called 'Jumping Clay'. Don't ask me why it's called that because it does NOT jump or anything. It feels like Play Doh when you take it out.Unlike Play Doh, it dries up to be non-sticky and foam like.

I am not creative. Neither is TH. That is why it surprises us that Sean has a spark of creativity. That boy loves making things. I have a boxful of cards, a trayful of figurines made out of clay and bits and bobs of things that he made hanging from various parts of the house.

His school provides a range of after school activities. This term he has decided to take Japanese cooking. I was not too keen as it was a bit expensive (it's outsourced so a fee is payable) . But I saw how keen he was and agreed to it as I try to encourage interests if it's educational and affordable. So far, he has made a range of sushi, dessert and a rice burger. Unfortunately, most of the end product did not last long enough for me to take pictures. The last one made it only because I took it away the minute he stepped out. Personally, I think it is pretty good. It tasted

pretty good too!

Made from rice, egg. Mayo was used as 'glue'

Part and parcel of life

This is what I face everyday on my way home from school.

Bangkok - City of Angels, place where Tom Yam originated from and also notorious for its traffic jams. After living here for so long, I have gotten quite used to the slow crawl of traffic. What makes it bearable is the fact that most of the drivers are fairly patient (you seldom hear honking) and drivers let you pass through or cut into their lanes. I guess if everyone figures they are in the same predicament, then hey, why sweat it.

So what does one do in a traffic jam? Well, it depends on the jam itself. There are what I call 'everyday' jams. These are where traffic slows down because you have five lanes that suddenly converge into two.

Or you have the case of the neverending traffic light. Traffic lights here can last up to three - four minutes. Doesn't sound long, right? Wait till you are in desperate need of the loo, then it becomes and eternity. My friend's son has had to pee in the bottle because he couldn't hold it in. There was an incident where the driver of the car fell asleep whilst waiting for the light to change. Had to get a motorbike boy to knock on the window to wake her up.

Then you have the jams caused by the 'side parkers'. These are the people who park to one side of a road that is already too narrow for two cars to pass. Amazingly, no matter how tight the squeeze, you will emerge on the other side without anyone cursing or flipping you the bird.

Another aspect of the 'side parkers' are the taxis that will screech to a sudden stop to pick up a fare. My favourite is when the would be passenger has a 'conversation' with the taxi driver. I'm guessing that they are talking about destination or how to find a place. The beauty of this is both taxi and passenger will ignore the growing queue of cars behind them.

The ultimate traffic jam is one that is caused by a political protest. I was fortunate (?) to be caught in one last year. It took me more than two hours to reach my destination (I could have flown to Singapore during that time). Why did I not turn back you may ask? Problem is there is a point of no return and once you passed it, you are stuck, stuck, stuck.

So, based on all these different jams, the question is "what does one do?" Many take the time to groom themselves ie make up, combing hair. I think if hairdryers could be plugged in, they would be used. You can almost finish reading the newspapers. Many take cat naps. But my favourite of all, is you can have your breakfast/lunch/dinner while in the car.

Portrait of an artist

This post is inspired by Monica ( http://hedgehogcomms.blogspot.com)who wrote about her son's artwork.

Sean has always loved to draw. Don't know where he gets it from as both TH and I are artistically challenged. He started off with the usual finger painting, progressed to Picasso like works and now he tries to tell stories with his little scribbles. He is fascinated with the whole process and will stand quietly and watch while a person sketches or paints.

I have a box of his drawings which I plan to keep and give it to him when he is older. Many of his drawings come with little "I love you" notes. When he is a surly, rebellious teen, I will fish these notes out and remind me of this time in his life when he was sweet and not shy to tell his mum that he loved her.

His first 'family' painting. Includes all our pets, even those that died. His 'girlfriend' Po somehow made it into
the picture too.


One of his many notes: It reads " I love you mam and dad bcos you ar snis to me"
Don't know what the bird is supposed to signify

He started drawing really small figures (some with details) to tell a story. Can't remember what this one was about.

Summer is here!

View from the room. ALL rooms have sea veiw.

When the weather turns colder, people living in BKK head for the hills (Chiang Mai, Chiang Rai, Mae Hong Son etc). As it gets hotter, we head for the many beaches that are available. The nearest beach is actually Pattaya which is an hour's drive away. However, I don't like it as the beach is nothing to speak of as it is covered with beach chairs and vendors hawking their wares. Also, there are many pubs and discos that are pretty sleazy and not child appropriate.

Hua Hin is a little further (about 2 hour drive) but because the Thai Royal family has a residence there, there is an absence of go-go bars and strip joints. They still have stretches of beaches that are fairly secluded far away from the crowd.

Last week, as it was the school holidays, my friend and I decided to take the children to Hua Hin for a couple of days. We had heard that Marriot had opened a new hotel on Cha-Am beach (about 20 minutes from Hua Hin) that had a great rate for Thai residents (2,500 baht nett including breakfast). Being Singaporean, we couldn't pass up on a good deal, could we?

We had a blast. The hotel was very comfortable and NEW. There was a huge swimming pool with a slide which the children loved. Best of all, the beach was fairly quiet (it could be that it was a weekday) and safe enough that we could let the children go off by themselves to dig for crabs while we lounged nearby. They spent hours just digging and digging and digging. It was good to see them enjoy this very simple pleasure. And me? I was enjoying reading my book whilst stuffing my face with eclairs and chips :)

There was a huge Kid's Club which was one of the biggest I have seen. They have loads of things for children from toddler to teens to enjoy. There were Playstations, snooker tables, foosball tables, a mini movie theater and even cribs for naps! I escaped from the heat for a while and curled up in a chair to read. Niiiceee.

A holiday is not complete without good food. We went to our favourite coffee shop for dinner and it did not let us down. Only thing about this place is that there is only 1 cook. So when it gets a bit crowded, you have to wait up to an hour to get your meal.

The kitchen where all the goodies came from.



'Or Suan' or oysters with egg. Very generous portion of oysters with gooey egg.

I'm not much of a vegetable eater but I love this. Kanna with 'plah khem' (salted fish). There is a smoky flavour to the dish.

'Hua chor' . Never had it this way but it was very good as there was a lot of crab meat.

When it was time to leave, I wondered why I don't go to Hua Hin more often. It has changed over the years. There is even a (gasp) mall and cinema there now. It gets crowded on weekends because half of BKK heads there. But there are still pockets of beaches where you can lie back with a good book and forget about whatever is going on out in the world.

I'm Popeye the sailor man..

Current favourite vegetable.

My son is a closet vegetarian. It's not a bad thing but he is so skinny that he's been described as a having skin stretched over his skeleton.

It's my fault because when I was pregnant, my friends will complain about how their children refuse to eat their veggies and they had to find ingenious ways of feeding it to them. I resolved that MY baby was not going to be like this. So when Sean started on solids, he was fed, carrots (not too much cos didn't want him to turn orange), loads and loads of broccoli (supposed to be good for brain) and spinach (because Popeye ate it). Till he was about 5, his favourite meal was plain porridge and steamed vegetables (no seasoning at all). It took him sometime to enjoy food with flavour.

Now, he would rather eat a whole plate of spinach or tau gae (bean sprouts) than meat or seafood. In a way, this does make things a little easier when we travel because I remember when we were in Lijiang (China) and donkey (yes, you read it right) was on the menu, I cooked some leafy veg in the steamboat and fed it to him. He ate it without complaint and loved it because the vegetables were so fresh.

I'm sure that as he grows, he's going to discover other things that he likes, but for now, he is my little vegetarian.

Dollars and Sense

Last Friday, we (parents) organised a mini sale of food and drinks to the students in the school that Sean attends. Funds raised from this sale was donated to a foundation that helps pay the school fees of less fortunate children. A father approached me to say that he is opposed to taking money from the younger children (his daughter is 4). I told him bluntly that I had no qualms about taking money from a young child if it was for the sake of fund raising. Of course he was shocked and we had a debate as to what age should a child start being made aware of money and its value.

Many parents I know don't want their children to think about money (ie how hard one has to work to earn it, buying something within your means etc). They feel that money shouldn't be a topic that a child has to think about. As a result, I see many children who have no concept of the value of things and take getting money for granted. Sean has a classmate (he is 8) whose dad bought him a Mini. The real one not the matchbox kind. My eyes almost fell out of my head when his mum told me that. Does the boy realise the value of the car? Does he know how even some adults (OK, me) will not fork over that kind of money?

Living away from Singapore (and my real life as I like to say) and in BKK with expats who come with large allowances for car, housing etc, I am afraid that Sean will grow up thinking that all this is normal. Our friends live in big apartments or houses, everyone has a maid, almost everyone has a driver (some children have personal drivers) and all the children have some form of electronic game/gadget.

I don't use the old 'we are poor' line. We aren't poor. We aren't rich either and he has to know that. I tell him how we get money and it's not by going to the ATM that magically spits out money. I tell him that if he wants something, he has to earn it. If he loses something, he has to pay me back. He has had to pay 800 baht (S$40) when he lost his Tamagotchi in school after I specifically told him NOT to bring it. Did he learn a lesson? Sure. now, he thinks twice about bringing expensive toys to school.

When he was 3, I gave him 20 baht and took him to the supermarket. Told him he had to buy 1 item for that amount or less. The dad that I had a debate with argued that a child that age can't read or write yet. My arguement was that they were starting to learn to read and recognise numbers and should know how to read price tags. Did Sean manage to buy his sweet for 20 baht? Yes he did. Best of all, he felt proud that he was given the responsibility of picking out his own sweet and going to the cashier.

When he started learning addition and subtraction, I told him to buy 3 items for 100 baht or less. He had to make sure he received the correct amount in change. It went on from there and now that he is at the ripe old age of 8, he gets 130 baht a week and it is up to him whether he wants to buy a snack or save the money.

He is like Scrooge and saves. But I am happy to see that he willingly gives to people or animals in need (he has a fund called "Poor dog in need, please help").I like to think that I've helped him learn how to budget. I do not top up money for him if his purchase exceeds what he has.

He has progressed to currency exchange (very interested in that, asks loads of questions and hoards US$ because I told him it's the most widely accpeted currency). Recently has has started to ask questions about stocks and shares.

I do believe that adults underestimate children. We forget how smart they are and how quick they are to learn. They also like feeling that they are being given responsibility by handling money which is largely an adults area. So, will I take money from a child in exchange for food/drink? You betcha!

Fields of ......

During the months of December to February, the sunflower fields in the Lopburi and Saraburi areas (about an hour from BKK) bloom.

Towards Christmas since the weather was beautiful, we decided to take a day trip to visit the sunflower fields. Unfortunately, most of the flowers had bloomed and dried up already. We were lucky to stumble across one that still had its flowers in bloom. Being Thailand, the enterprising locals were selling the by-products of the sunflowers ie seeds that have been roasted and salted to perfection! Yuuummm...

Up, up and away...

Nowadays, I realise that many children do not do the things that I did when I was a child (all those years ago!). With so many mechanical and/or electronic things on hand, children like Sean have missed out on some of the simple pleasures of childhood.

Recently, we introduced him to kite flying. Yes, I know it's a simple thing but living in a major concrete jungle with very little open space, it's not something that we can do everyday. TH was trying to explain to him how he used to grind glass and coat the kite string with it before 'fighting' with, and cutting other kites. My practical son commented:"you are wasting money when you kite gets cut and flies away."

I thought it was also a good 'daddy and me' time for the both of them. Most days, Sean is asleep by the time TH comes home. I don't want to be doing everything with Sean and not leave anything that TH can do with him. I thoroughly enjoyed watching my husband re-live his childhood and my son discover a new experience. Both of them had a blast!

Leaving...

Yesterday I had to tell Sean that we were leaving BKK for another country. My boy, who has grown up in BKK and calls it home, cried. Sean is not one for crying over 'little' things. The last time he cried was when our dog Raisin died.

It broke my heart to see him turn away and his skinny shoulders shake because he didn't want me to see him cry. Of course he wanted to know why. I had to explain to him it was because daddy's job required us to move. He went on to ask about how we were going to leave his friends, teachers, my maid and even his Chinese tuition teacher.

I told him we still had about 6-7 months before we had to leave. His reply, "since we've stayed here for 9 years, can't we stay another 9 before I am ready to leave?"

I wanted to tell him that I was not ready to leave too. It made me start thinking about how living in BKK had changed me.

For one thing, I had to leave my confort zone. I have met people that I wouldn't have met or bothered to get to know if I was living in Singapore. I am actually a pretty reserved person but I have had to open up in order to let these new friends into my life.

Before coming here, I never went for a holiday without TH. Here, I have been on many trips without him and it has not affected our relationship. I remember the first trip I took without him was to Hua Hin by train. It was because the hotel voucher we had bought was going to expire and TH had to work that weekend. So, with baby, stroller and luggage in tow, I boarded the train to Hua Hin worried that I would not be able to have a good time. Surprise, we did and from them on, my friends and I have packed ourselves with our children and gone for short trips while the dads worked.

I have never not worked. When I came with a 3 month old infant, I honestly found it very difficult NOT working and then having to take care of a baby. I was so used to setting goals and trying to meet my sales target that it took me sometime to actually slow down and enjoy my time with my baby.

The most important part of living here was for me to be able to look after Sean. I have had the privilege to watch my baby grow from a colicky infant to energetic toddler to funny, sweet little boy.

All said and done, I love my life here. We have benefited as a family and for me as a person. I know that the next place we go to will bring us all different experiences that will last us a lifetime.